Break out the Hazmat Suits

It's been a while my friends, too, too long.  I started to sell Mary Kay (yes, yes, I know), and it has taken up a lot of my time over the past month.  Things are up and running now, somewhat, so I can finally breathe again.

Don't worry, insight from within the pink bubble will be coming later, in case you want to hear it.

For the last 3 weeks, our family has been plagued, literally... PLAGUED.  Think Bubonic.  Black.  Something along those lines.

The CDC should be coming to our house shortly to research the life cycle of the current virus-plague.

I've prepared a brief timeline for them:

• Plague began 3 weeks ago with Patient #1 (known as Terrorist #1).  Symptoms were coughing, complaining about coughing, coughing in bed, and coughing while awake.  Treatment included allergy medicine and honey, but not at the same time.  Gross.  Origin of virus-plague is thought to be anything the raccoon/child subject touched and/or put into his mouth.  Since he puts his hands on EVERYTHING and puts almost EVERYTHING in his mouth at NINE YEARS OLD, object containing virus-plague could be:
• metallic in nature (e.g., nail, screw, coin, magnet, etc.)
• Lego in nature
• string-like in nature (e.g., string, rubber bands, etc.)
• any-other-possible-object-known-to-man in nature
• Patient #2 (known as Terrorist #2) came down with the same cough as Patient #1 approximately one week after being coughed on constantly (see Patient #1).  Parents denied that Patient #2 was sick, other than the cough, only to be called from school because Patient #2 had a fever over 100.  4 days home from school commenced, with constant fever ranging between 99 and 101, with nasty, juicy cough.
• Patient #3 (known as Mommy) began to get sick at the end of last week (see Patients #1 and #2).  Random coughing fits (thought to originally be overly dramatic acting by Patient #2) commenced, along with fever ranging between 99 and 100.  Chills mixed with hot flashes and aching also lasted 2-3 days.
• Patient #4 (known as Terrorist #4) came down with symptoms around the same time as Patient #3.  Fever.  Extreme mood swings.  Exhaustion.  Temper tantrums.  Vomiting due to gag reflex while coughing.  Fun stuff.
• Patient #5 (known as Daddy) also started with symptoms approximately 3-4 days after Patient #3.  Coughing fits, hot flashes, aching, and low grade fever commenced.  
• Patient #6 (known as Terrorist #3) was the last to fall ill.  Fever began Monday evening this week and Patient #6 was forced to stay home from school the rest of the week.  Coughing fits, especially at night, mixed with fevers ranging from 99 to 101.

Patient #1 seems to be the only one fine now.  The rest of us are still either congested, coughing, or both... and there are still a few fevers lingering around.

The plague sucks.

It's bloody awful.

Treatment: 

• Children: Motrin, dosage according to directions
• Adults: Ibuprofen, dosage not necessarily according to directions (but the hubby worked in a pharmacy, so he's an expert, right?)
• Note: Alcohol is also an acceptable form of treatment after 8pm.  It's most definitely an antiseptic.

So, that's been my life for the past 3 weeks.  You know, I should probably wash all the kids' bed linens.  Ugh... those darn bunk beds are so hard!  I need some person or animal to puke on them to force me to change them.  I'm really, really good at changing something due to vomit. 

All good moms say that, right?

We will find out soon if the animals can get the plague.  Terrorist #4 coughed on one of the cats quite a bit today.

Oh well, something similar happens every fall as soon as the terrorists go back to school.  

You know what?  I'd rather have the plague than lice.

Say a prayer for me, 

Kristin